Four Ways Gratitude Helps You Juggle Your New Elephants
Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you have experienced or at least read about the many benefits of gratitude to you. They include:
• Improved mental health
• Better sleep
• Deeper connections with others
• Enhanced job performance
Interestingly enough, many of these moments of gratitude arise when something positive is happening in our lives. It’s easy to be grateful when things are going your way. What about when your work or life feels overwhelming? Is your first thought one of gratitude, or is it more like, “Oh crap! How am I going to get through this?
In my own life I have found it of tremendous value to explore why I should be grateful that this difficult circumstance, project, or relationship is happening to me now. I’ve also seen many of my coaching clients find the motivation to tackle hard things in their lives when they started cultivating an attitude of gratitude.
If you see something showing up in your life that feels physically, mentally, emotionally, or financially heavy to you (i.e. an elephant 🐘), here are four ways I believe focusing on gratitude can lighten the load and help you move forward with greater confidence:
You recognize what’s RIGHT in this moment.
When things get hard, your first thought is to focus on what’s wrong. Forcing yourself to identify what’s right improves your motivation and creates a healthier perspective. If your workload is overwhelming, what’s right may be that you have a life partner who will support you as you work through it. Or the temporary nature of this overload may be something to focus on.
You clarify the values that will guide your choices going forward.
Making the best decisions when in a difficult season of life can be challenging because there are so many emotions within you and uncertainty around you. When you feel or express gratitude, it reminds you of what is most important to you. You now have a clearer sense of the values you want to influence the choices you make in this season.
For about four years I’ve kept a simple gratitude journal. Each morning I write three things I am grateful for before engaging in any other activities. I’ve noticed that if, on the days that feel really heavy to me, I will read several entries from the past month, I have a greater peace about the choices I need to make that day.
You identify potential resources.
When you face a new challenge in your work or life one thought is that you don’t have what it takes to address it. Gratitude reminds us of skills, relationships, and past experiences that we can utilize in this new situation.
A poignant question I have sometimes asked a coaching client struggling with overload is, “What is a difficult experience you have had in the past that you’re grateful for now?” As they share the experience it’s easy to connect something they gained in that journey they can use to better handle their current challenge.
What is a resource you need in this new situation that will be brought to mind by reflecting with gratitude on your past experiences?
It increases your optimism.
Optimism has a huge influence on achieving a better outcome in times of difficulty. As we hear so often, we may not always be able to control our circumstances, but we do have the power to change our attitude about how we let circumstances affect us.
I love the quote by Michael J. Fox, as he explained the correlation between gratitude and optimism. He said, “Optimism is really rooted in gratitude.” Optimism is sustainable when you keep coming back to gratitude, and what follows from that is acceptance. Accepting that this thing has happened, and you accept it for what it is.”
If it’s still difficult for you to stop and think gratefully as you face a difficulty at work or in your personal endeavors, try these four activities/questions to make the shift:
• Make a list of 10-15 things for which you are grateful. What do they suggest you value? What should be your next step with this tough situation knowing this is what you value
• What’s right about this situation occurring now instead of at another time?
• What have I experienced in the past that will help me get through this well?
• Who am I grateful for in my life? What have I learned from them that I can use in this situation?
And if you need one last reminder of the power of gratitude to make those elephants more manageable, here's some wisdom from Melody Beattie, who knows alot about overcoming difficulty in your life:
How does gratitude help you face overload or difficult situations in your life? I'd love to hear your thoughts in the comments below!
