How To Overcome Your 7 Scary Thoughts About Change

In a past blog, best-selling author Seth Godin wrote: 

“We say, ‘I am afraid’ as if the fear is us, forever. We don’t say, ‘I am a fever,’ or ‘I am a sore foot.’ No, in those cases, we acknowledge that it’s a temporary condition, something we have, at least for now, but won’t have forever.

Godin’s words are extremely relevant right now as they remind me that the key to moving forward in times of change is to specifically identify what’s scaring me, and then look for solutions to address those internal or external barriers.

Here’s my list of the seven most frequent frights I hear people (including me) mention about change, and what you can do to exorcise them from your mind so you can move forward:

I don’t have all the resources I need.

Are you sure you even know everything you’re going to need to make the change successful? Make a list of the resources you think are critical to moving forward. Next, identify some people who have achieved success with a similar change and find out what they most needed to keep going. Their answers might surprise you and help you see you already have what you need to get started.

I won’t do it right.

Correct. But at least you ARE taking action, which gives you feedback on what your next steps should be. Think about driving your car and turning the steering wheel to change direction. When your car is sitting still, it takes more energy to turn the wheel. When you get moving, however, you only need to make slight adjustments to stay in your lane. Moving forward with a change, even slowly, gives you the momentum to keep going and make adjustments as needed.

This isn’t the perfect time.

Certainly you don’t want to rush into a change without your due diligence, but waiting for all the factors to come together rarely happens. A better question might be, “What are the current circumstances that create a favorable environment for this change to happen?” In my training programs on change, I talk about your “growing season,” and ask participants to identify what resources are available now that might not be in the future if they wait for perfect conditions.

It doesn’t follow the plan I had for myself.

Okay. But does it align with the values and goals you have for yourself? If it’s been awhile since you clearly articulated your values and goals, spend some time revisiting them. You might just find that there are numerous choices you could make and still be true to them.

I’ll disappoint someone.

News flash. You’ll almost ALWAYS disappoint someone with the choices you make. The more important exercise here is to determine who you don’t want to disappoint. Make a list and prioritize the people on it (Hint: This is easier if you reflect on your values like I mentioned earlier). Hopefully your name is at the top of the list because you recognize that, in many cases, by not changing, you are settling for less than you know you can be.

I might fail.

Yep. Gonna happen. Multiple times and in some really messy ways. Congratulations. You’re on your way to success. As I mentioned earlier, when you start taking action it gives you information and experience to determine your next step in the journey.

And if you’re still feeling too frightened to change, here's the seventh thought: Imagine what if would feel like to look back one day and say, “I sure regret…”

Now that is something too scary for me to even think about.